zotmeister | Terminology

It's been far too long since I did one of these. This time around, I thought it'd be a good idea to vent some frustration [which I still have in spades] by sharing some of the catchphrases I tend to spout when I want to add some light-heartedness to when things go sour (as is my usual response): go to Lose: For when the pain seems to cycle endlessly. This comes from the boardgame This Game Is Bonkers!, which provides each player with a card at the start of the game (one guess what it reads) that serves as a magic bullet to end someone's turn (and that's the sort of game where it's easy to get stuck in a loop that guarantees victory otherwise). give em back es three cents and tell em to go to Hell: For when something is in need of dismissal. This is the punchline of a joke I first encountered in GAMES Magazine decades ago, as part of an article on what makes jokes funny. Fittingly enough, the joke isn't funny, and certainly isn't worth repeating here, but out of its original context (or perhaps because its original context is so lame) the punchline itself has proven to often be hilarious. I hate you, Shapeasaurus.: For when I'm faced with something I'd rather not deal with. A relatively recent addition to my repertoire, it comes from the excellent videogame Raskulls. I don't want to spoil it - the game is well worth playing through, and has moments even funnier than the one I'm referencing (including one exchange that is quite possibly the absolute funniest ever in any videogame, and I've seen a LOT of videogames). Ah, shoot - a door! I didn't plan on this!: For when something obvious has been overlooked. This of course comes from the Mystery Science Theater 3000 heckling of Mitchell, arguably the funniest thing ever aired on television. Fun fact: I was recently playing The Game of Things when as the judge I pulled the card "Things that might keep you out of Heaven"; my bluff was "Ah, shoot - a gate! I didn't plan on this!". It got the biggest laugh, and is so far the only time I've played where the initial reading of responses in a round was preempted by the first accuser being so certain of an attribution that e made es guess before hearing them all. It was glorious. "Oh, it's a scyyythe." is the phrase for when the overlooked is not quite so obvious; that of course hails from the final episode of Blackadder II, which is also arguably the funniest thing ever aired on television. Oh, and that's a bad miss.: For small generic failures. This is a running gag of David Mitchell's snooker-commentator-character Ted Wilkes in the first season of That Mitchell and Webb Look. You had to be there. "HENNIMOOOOORE!" from the third season also has potential to become often quoted by me for not-so-small failures. Damn you, Nicolas.: For when a sacrifice is required. This one actually isn't light-hearted at all. This is the final line of the television series Forever Knight. Naturally, I refuse to spoil anything about it. forgot to not suck: For lapses in skill. This one I just plain made up. I'm sure my friends could remind me of any I may have missed. - ZM

Terminology

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